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Midway through an 11 o'clock number set in a bar in "The Greatest Showman" – there are several such numbers; this movie musical's turned up to 11 all the time – Hugh Jackman, as impresario P. If you let your mind wander during "Pitch Perfect 3" – and oh, my friends, it's very easy to do – you might picture the world 20 years from now.I have one question for you: Why do I always fall in love with lesbians? It's also possible you find women with a certain degree of masculine energy and/or swagger attractive, and women with that swagger are somewhat likelier to be lesbians, slightly upping your chances of falling in love with four girls-who-turned-out-to-be-lesbians in a row.Why do I instantly fall in love with girls who have that something more in their eyes? Girls whom I'd rather protect and embrace than take to bed? Since September, we have been living in two different cities because she went away to study. Personally, ITALY, I'm attracted to guys with a certain degree of feminine swagger and, needless to say, these guys are likelier to be gay.The last three girls who fit this description all turned out to be lesbians. I am afraid that one day she is going to tell me she's gay too. But while almost all effeminate guys are gay—so stigmatized is femininity in males (even in the gay community)—masculine swagger in women is less stigmatized and therefore somewhat less likely to correlate as strongly with lesbianism.The last girl with whom this happened told me it was my "Red Cross" mind-set that made me fall in love with girls who are insecure/sad/melancholy, so I have a sort of selection bias that excludes most straight girls I meet. She always talks with me about a new super-cute female friend. I have recently met another girl, super empathetic. Women with masculine swagger and men with feminine swagger are also likely to be self-conscious about their gender-nonconforming traits, particularly when they're young and/or not yet out, and that can read as melancholy and/or insecurity. Women—straight or bi or lesbian—don't need "saving." They need respect, they need to be taken seriously, they need bodily autonomy, and they need loving partners and political allies. Your girlfriend may be a lesbian—anyone could in these highly fluid days, even me.
You ova'd up, you didn't whine or moan, you didn't spread wild conspiracy theories or march on Washington waving signs that proved you were every bit as misinformed as you are illiterate.